Boo

In honor of Halloween, this week's cool clip is the full version of "Thriller." If you want the shortened version, you can find it here.

I had my first of two Halloween parties this past weekend. Although I have no problem dressing up for no good reason, I'm not really a fan of dressing up for Halloween. My costume this year was driven by a total lack of ideas and laziness. I decided to go as Michael Scott, from "The Office" -- particularly the episode from Season 2 where he burns his foot on a George Foreman grill.

Yeah, it was that obscure.

Although it had the benefit of being easy (all I needed was some bubble wrap and crutches, really), it was difficult to describe who I was to anyone who wasn't VERY familiar with the show. And even then, it really wasn't that funny. It might have been better had I tried to stay in character the whole evening, but that lasted about ... oh, two minutes. I only stayed on the crutches for about half that time.

At any rate, here's how it looked, compared with a scene from that episode:





So I've decided to come up with something else by Tuesday night.
We'll see how that goes...

Running ... Man ...

I vowed after not preparing for last year's 5K race that I would train at least a little for this year's. I didn't.

I ended up walking all of the race Saturday past about mile 1. It was in the local botanical gardens, which was a nice setting. I don't know why everyone was in such a hurry. Me? I'm a stop and smell the flowers kind of guy. So I decided to take my time.

There was also the fact that I made a poor choice in footwear. I chose a pair of running shoes that I had forgotten hadn't been broken in yet. The jabbing pain of the shoes reminded me about half a mile in. I ended up taking a good hunk of skin off of my right foot and gave myself a nice big blister on the left by the time I was done. At least if I wasn't fast, I was bleeding. It made me feel a little manlier.

Plus, I think a lot of people forgot about the fable of the tortoise and hare. Sure, I may have been going slowly, but if any of those runners had stopped to take a nap, I totally would have passed them on my way to the finish line.

The Trudge Report

I went hiking this weekend with Reuben, one of my old college roommates. We had ambitious plans -- awake at 8 a.m. Sunday, drive the two hours to Shenandoah National Park and then hike for 10 miles. One might say the plans were overly ambitious.

After playing video games until later than we should have, we awoke at 9 and got to the trailhead at 1 p.m. Still, the guidebook said the hike, which was of moderate difficulty, would take five hours -- totally doable before the sun set.

Unfortunately, our pace didn't quite keep up. It could have been that we stopped a lot to take photos of the fall colors. Or it's possible the guy who writes hiking guides for a living was in better shape. It was probably the photos.

It was a beautiful hike, though, filled with some nice panoramas that would have been even better if they had only cut down some of the trees that were blocking the view.

After a couple of short, but steep, sidetrips to see some waterfalls, we began to get a little tired.

We were at mile marker 2.1.

We carried on though, up and down hills, fording rivers and scaring what we're pretty sure was an owl into quick flight. We saw leaf bugs, stick bugs and, toward the end, a few deer. I took my regular, nondigital camera, though, so I'm afraid I can't show off the 2.5 rolls of film I took in the first three hours before the batteries in my camera died. Sorry about that.

By the time we had gone about four miles, two things were obvious:
1) Hiking the full 10 miles was not a good idea if we wished to survive.
2) There was no way we were going to make 10 miles before dark.

So we decided to take an alternative route that cut off a little less than two miles from the hike. It was uphill for most of the way back, and it's here that the hiking became more like trudging. Where the first part of the hike had been filled with laughter and talking, now there was mostly silence and trying not to think about how much farther we had to go. I bided my time thinking of various ways we could instead be moving -- four-wheeler Segway, flying monkey, the Batwing, which I would call using my remote control. Sadly, none of these were an option.

As it began to get darker, we picked up the pace, much to the dismay of our major muscle groups. We had already discussed that if we were stuck in the woods overnight, I could eat Reuben if it became necessary. It only made sense -- he was the bigger of us and would provide more sustenance. Sure, I still had two Nutrigrain bars in my pack, but I would probably want those for the hike out the next morning.

Luckily for everyone, we got to the car as the last light was fading.
Overall, it was fun, but next time, maybe I'll aim a little shorter for the first hike of the season.

And I'll bring ketchup. Just in case.

What's been going on

Sorry the posts have been so sparse lately. Work has been busy and will continue to be for a while until they hire a replacement for my boss. But here's the lowdown on what I've been up to the past few weeks.

I went to Tennessee for wedding No. 4 of the year. It was a very nice ceremony and a lot of fun with a good group of friends. We also rented a convertible to drive around in, which was fun, and played a lot of poker (I won $15.), so good times all around.

Speaking of rental cars, I've received a letter from National claiming I owe them money for damage to the car I rented in California. I've called them back and am waiting for a return call to see what exactly the bastards think I did given that I returned the car in the same condition I got it. I foresee a good fight coming up, so stay tuned.

While at Target one day the other week, I either got hit on or recruited for a job. I'm not entirely sure which. It started in the snack aisle with some casual banter that seemed sort of flirty. Then she asked me what I did for work. I told her and she asked if I had ever considered doing freelance marketing work. I said no, I was busy enough as it was. Then things went in that direction for a bit until she gave me her card and said if I changed my mind to let her know. I found this rather bizarre because I would never walk up to some random person and ask if they wanted to freelance copy edit for me. After telling the story to my friend The Godmother, she said a lot of people, particularly if they're in something like marketing, use their jobs that way to flirt and try to get dates. I found it thoroughly confusing. And no, I have no intention of calling.

Otherwise, I've seen "The Departed" and am going hiking this weekend. Should be fun times.

Friends don't let friends drive stupid

If Death is after me, apparently the form of the destructor chosen for me is an automobile.

Yesterday, I was driving through an intersection near my house where there are numerous accidents because people coming out of Wal-Mart or the grocery store get impatient and do dumb things. Despite the stop sign he had, the driver of a truck didn't think stopping was a good idea until he was halfway into the intersection. The car right in front of me tried to stop but still hit the truck. They were fine (cars not so much) and a police officer was on the scene within two minutes, but I was glad I wasn't one car further ahead (or following too closely).

Then tonight I had a green light to go through an intersection (it had been green for some time, incidentally), when a car blew through its red light at about 60 mph or more. I happened to be about two or three seconds away from the intersection when it happened, and I saw it coming out of the corner of me eye, but it was a good thing I wasn't going a bit faster.

These incidents, along with just seeing people drive on a regular basis, has led me to the conclusion that we need to change a few things about the way we give out driver's licenses.

First, we need to make sure that everyone who takes a driver's test has to do a number of basic things besides just parallel parking -- merging on and off the highway and driving in busy intersections, among others.

The second is to make people take driving tests more often. We take them when we're 16 and then that's pretty much it. People should have to take it again at 18 or 21, just to make sure they're still following safe driving practices. And then once every 10 or so years after that. Once you hit a certain age, say 65, you have to take it every 5 years to get your license renewed. This helps weed out elderly people who may not be willing to admit or may not be aware they can't still safely get behind a wheel. A lot of people probably won't like having to get tested more often, but most of them are probably the bad drivers.

And if it gets more people to use turn signals and not run red lights, I think it's probably worth it.

White and nerdy

Sorry this week's clip is a little late. Finally ... Weird Al comes up with a song that speaks to me.